Sometimes even I have setbacks and defeats in my own life, which prompted me to share this story with you. If you’re watching my videos or reading my content, you may possibly get the impression that I am always lucky and blessed with successes and abundance “24/7”. I too am human and have had my own share of trials and tribulations during my journey.
Life has handed me the occasional blow too. I’ve had many knock-downs. This past week-end was one of them. In late spring or early summer of this year, I began training in “krav maga”, the israeli self-defense system. It’s a fantastic workout, you make new friends, meet great people, learn useful and lifesaving skills. I enjoy it tremendously. Well, a few weeks ago, I signed up for a proficiency test, which was administered this past Saturday by a certified instructor flown in from Germany. The test started at 10:00 and ended for me at 15:30, some 5-1/2 hours later. It was an extremely physically demanding, grueling test, during which, according to my Fitbit, I burnt close to 3000 calories. We only had 2 x 15-min. breaks. I had given 115% the entire duration of the test and was happy to even make it through. No one quit that day. I believe there were 15-17 of us.
Following my 5-1/2 hour test, I had to wait about 2 more hours to find out the results, learning only at the very end, that all my hard work, struggle and effort had not been enough to pass. I was among a small handful who did not make it through that day. No Certificate, no badge.
Saturday was a very humbling experience. It was for me personally a painful reminder (I’m still sore and stiff 2 days after the test) that life will defeat you sometimes even when you have done all the right things and given it your all. Sometimes your best efforts are not enough.
For the days leading up to the test, and throughout the entire test-day itself, it had been entirely confident that I had learned enough, I had understood the techniques enough, and that I had done enough and done what was expected of me. There was NO doubt in my mind that I would make it, pass and obtain my credentials. I saw that certificate in my hand the entire time. I certainly did not ‘consciously’ choose to fail that day or underperform in any way.
Standing there without any sort of validation of my efforts was a painful blow. I was shocked, humiliated and saddened.
Lesson being: Life will kick you in the teeth from time to time, despite your efforts, your preparation, your intention. Not always will life go “your way”, the way you want it to go. I also teach people to focus their mind, their thoughts, on their desired outcome and try and manifest the result they desire. I never said it was ‘easy’. I myself struggle with this too. Sometimes I manifest things with ease, sometimes things go exactly how I wanted or intended. But every now and again they do not. Defeats and setbacks will occur, but it is how we deal with them, that defines us and the lesson(s) of the event. We can either accept defeat and wallow in misery, or we can get back up on the horse and soldier forward, and keep that inner warrior-spirit going. It’s our choice. We may not understand what the lesson was or why things happened this way (= not the way we had hoped), but in due time we will have perspective, and chances are, that in 6 months, or 1 year, or even in 5 years, this setback or defeat (large or small) will not matter much.